Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
