New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
