singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Found the puke drawer
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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