also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
