She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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