You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
