My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
