apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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