please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize