He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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