Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
