Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
