he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
