physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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