redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
