Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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