wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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