NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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