his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
