OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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