I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
