well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
