I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
