i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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