So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
