id be glad to
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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