i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
