is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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