doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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