No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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