ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Found your dick twin last night
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
