DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize