Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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