Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize