We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
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and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
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I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
you never un-have a 4some
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize