worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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