can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
