tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
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