Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Is it because I queefed?
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Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
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you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.