kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.