I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
