That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
soo... how was my night?
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