I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize