its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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