Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I wear drunk well.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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