Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize