Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
