These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
