Apparently you make a good broom.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
