they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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