I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
