Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
